Religion Can Be Funny Too

Who says religion can't be funny?
How to tell if a Catholic is driving too fast


Jewish Olympic Swimmer





Church can be hilarious!












The Woodpecker Might have to go!


Everything I need to know about life, I learned from Noah's Ark
One : Don't miss the boat.
Two : Remember that we are all in the same boat.
Three : Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the Ark.
Four : Stay fit When you're 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.
Five : Don't listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.
Six : Build your future on high ground.
Seven : For safety's sake, travel in pairs.
Eight : Speed isn't always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.
Nine : When you're stressed, float a while.
Ten : Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals.
Eleven : No matter the storm, when you are with God, there's always a rainbow waiting...Pass this along and make someone else smile, too.

Lessons from life...

Lessons from life...

Marriage

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry

After marriage, husband and wife become ! two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Dumas

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
Henny Youngman

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
Sam Kinison

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
James Holt McGavran

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
Patrick Murray

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
Anonymous

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Milton Berle

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
Anonymous

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

SEND THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH......AND TO THOSE LADIES WITH A SENSE OF HUMOUR WHO CAN HANDLE IT!!!!!!!

Re-Charging Cell Phones DONT DO THIS!

READ THIS - very important information.............

I've done this too! Never thought about how dangerous it might be!Re-Charging Cell Phones I went to smalltownlottery.com to be sure it wasn't an urban legend & it's not. It is very true! And I do this all the time! Not anymore!!!!!!!! This seems important enough to forward to others. It's wise to be safe and safe being wise. This was also on Pittsburgh 's WTAE channel 4 News.

REMEMBER: Never, ever answer a cell phone while it is being CHARGED!!

A few days ago, a person was recharging his cell phone at home. Just at that time a call came and he answered it with the instrument still connected to the outlet. After a few seconds electricity flowed into the cell phone unrestrained and the young man was thrown to the ground with a heavy thud. His parents rushed to the room only to find him unconscious, with a weak heartbeat and burnt fingers. He was rushed to the nearby hospital, but was pronounced dead on arrival.

Cell phones are a very useful modern invention.
However, we must be aware that it can also be an instrument of death.

Never use the cell phone while it is hooked to the electrical outlet, unplug it to use it, then plug it back in to outlet to finish recharging!

FORWARD THIS TO THE PEOPLE THAT MATTER IN YOUR LIFE,

I JUST DID!!!

credit card cloner

redit card ‘cloner’ caught
By Evelyn Macairan
Thursday, August 30, 2007
The National Bureau of Investigation (NBI) yesterday advised the public to keep their eyes on their credit cards after its agents arrested a member of a credit card fraud syndicate and recovered a pocket-size device used to make “clones” of real cards.
NBI Director Nestor Mantaring said driver Melvin Garcia, 30, and waiter Menandro Caleze, 36, are allegedly two members of the syndicate whose suspected mastermind, Jonathan Valencerina, remains at large.
Garcia and Caleze were charged with violating Republic Act 8484, otherwise known as the Access Device Act, before the Pasay City Prosecutor’s Office.
Authorities, however, are eyeing placing Caleze under the witness protection program since he was the one who confessed that he was with the syndicate.
Mantaring added that under the RA 8484, mere possession of the equipment is already a violation of the law.
Special Investigator Waldo Palattao, of the NBI-Anti-Fraud and Computer Crimes Division (AFCCD), said this is the first time they confiscated a device of this kind.
“Before, credit card fraud syndicates would have to first steal the card before they could forge the card and the signature. But (now), they would just have to swipe the card in their skimming device, which they can carry around, right inside the establishment and they could manufacture a duplicate card on their own,” he said.
The NBI-AFCCD was alerted to this modus operandi after Ray Talavera learned that someone else used his credit card and purchased P64,808 worth of groceries at a mall in Marilao, Bulacan.
Talavera’s last legal transaction was traced to a KTV bar called Club Malizzia located along Roxas Boulevard in Pasay City . The owner of the bar, Ronald Lim, was immediately alerted by the irregularity and he confronted his employees. Caleze came forward and confessed his involvement in creating clones of the credit cards.
He said Valencerina allegedly approached him and said he would earn P500 to P700 for every credit card he would swipe into the small black gadget. On Aug. 15 and 16, he was able to copy six credit cards and was paid P2,500.
Last Aug. 23, Valencerina reportedly informed Caleze that his runner, Garcia, will deliver a new device. The NBI set up an entrapment, arresting Garcia after he gave Caleze the device at midnight .
The syndicate’s alleged modus operandi is to connive with waiters and other personnel in establishments such as restaurants. In many restaurants, customers are required to hand over their credit card to waiters, who would bring the card to the cashier, who will swipe it in the credit card machine.
The deception starts when the employee would swipe the card in the cloning device, which has a memory chip to store the data from the cards. Once the device is full, the employee exchanges it for a fresh one, delivered by a runner.
The device would then be run through a card reader, which will download the data that will be used to make “clones” of the original cards.
“It is more possible to duplicate the cards in restaurants because the card owners do not see what happens to their cards, unlike in shopping malls and grocery stores when their cards are swiped before their eyes,” Mantaring said.
NBI-AFCCD chief Assistant Regional Director Vicente de Guzman Jr. added that this should serve as an “eye opener to the business establishment owners to see to it that their personnel are not in cahoots with unscrupulous people, for them not to be lured into fraudulent schemes.”
Garcia said he was unaware about the syndicate’s operations and was only told to deliver perfumes. He was paid P300 every time.
The NBI has started looking for the syndicate’s other members since there is a possibility that they may have in their possession a machine used to manufacture bogus credit cards.
The bureau will also coordinate with banks that issue credit cards.

Bank Account

Bank Account

let us be thankful

I AM THANKFUL:

FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.

FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.

FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED .

FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.

FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.

FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE

FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME

FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.

FOR THE PARKING SPOT I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION

FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.

FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I CAN HEAR.

FOR THE PILE OF
LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.

FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.

FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.

AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.

SEND THIS TO SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT. I JUST DID.

Live well, Laugh often, & Love w ith all of your heart!

This actually brought tears to my eyes

To
all my family & friends I want to THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.

ONCE
YOU READ THIS YOU WILL UNDERSTAND!

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, 'Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday.' Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

'Jack, did you hear me?'

'Oh, sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago,' Jack said.

'Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it,' Mom told him.

'I loved that old house he lived in,' Jack said.

'You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life,' she said 'He's the one who taught me carpentry,' he said. 'I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were
important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral,' Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a mome nt. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

'What's wrong, Jack?' his Mom asked.

'The box is gone,' he said

'What box?' Mom asked.

'There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a t housand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was 'the thing I value most,'' Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

'Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him,' Jack said. 'I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom.'

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. 'Signature required on a package No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days,' the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. 'Mr. Harold Belser' it read. Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.




'Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life.' A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found
these words engraved:

'Jack, Thanks for your time! -Harold Belser.'

'The thing he valued most was...my time'

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. 'Why?' Janet, his assistant asked.

'I need some time to spend with my son,' he said.

'Oh, by the way, Janet, thanks for your time!'

'Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,'

Think about this. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

! 1 At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.

2.At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3 A smile from you can bring happiness to a! nyone, even if they don't like you.

4. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

5. You mean the world to someone.

6. If not for you, someone may not be living.

7. You are special and unique.

8. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you trust God to do what's best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, somethin! g good can still come from it.

10 When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.

11. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

12 Always remember the compliments you received . Forget about the rude remarks.

13 . Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you'll both be happy

14 If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

Send this letter to all the people you care about, if you do so, you will certainly brighten someone's day and might change their perspective on life...for the better.

To everyone I send this to Thanks for your time !

What Religion is your bra?

Do you need a laugh??
What Religion is Your Bra?

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy 's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, 'I'd like to buy a bra for my wife.

' ' What type of bra?' asked the clerk.

' Type?' inquires the man, 'There's more than one type?'

' Look around,' said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. 'Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from .' Relieved, the man asked about the types.
The saleslady replied:
'There are the Catholic,
the Salvation Army,
the Presbyterian,
and the Baptist types.
Which one would you prefer?'

Now totally befuddled,
the man asked about
the differences between them.
The Saleslady responded,
'It is all really quite simple. ...

The Catholic type
supports the masses;

The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen;
The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright; and

The Baptist type makes mountains out of mole hills.'

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes?
If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!

(A} Almost Boobs...
{B} Barely there...
{C} Can't Complain!...
{D} Dang!...
{DD} Double dang!...
{E} Enormous!...
{F} Fake...
{G} Get a Reduction...
{H} Help me, I've fallen
and I can't get up!...

Send this to
all that will appreciate it!

They forgot the German bra.

Holtzemfromfloppen

THINGS GOD WON'T ASK

THINGS GOD WON'T ASK

God won't ask what kind of car you drove, He'll ask how many people you drove who didn't have transportation.

God won't ask the square footage of your house, He'll ask how many people you welcomed into your home.

God won't ask about the clothes you had in your closet, He'll ask how many you helped to clothe.

God won't ask what your highest salary was, He'll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.

God won't ask what your job title was, He'll ask if you performed your job to the best of our ability.

God won't ask how many friends you had, He'll ask how many people to whom you were a friend.

God won't ask in what neighborhood you lived, He'll ask how you treated your neighbors.

God won't ask about the color of your skin, He'll ask about the content of your character.

God won't ask why it took you so long to seek Salvation, He'll lovingly take you to your mansion in heaven, and not to the gates of Hell.

God won't ask how many people you forwarded this to, He'll ask if you were ashamed to pass it on to your friends.

A beautiful poem written by a Father to save his Daughter...

beautiful poem written by a Father to save his Daughter !!!

Do read it once...........I am sure u also won't be left untouched by the words and the feelings that they depict.
The last stanza, after reading from the beginning, suddenly slows down the heart-beats..

DAD - BABY RACHEL - MOM

A sad Dad's poem...
This is a beautiful poem. There is an appeal from a Zimbabwean
couple at the bottom of message, not asking for anything more
than that you hand the poem on.
The husband wrote the poem.


TO MY CHILD
Just for this morning, I am going to
smile when I see your face and laugh
when I feel like crying.
Just for this morning, I will let you
choose what you want to wear,
and smile and say how perfect it is.
Just for this morning, I am going to step
over the laundry and pick you up and take you to
the park to play.
Just for this morning, I will leave the
dishes in the sink, and let you teach me how to put
that puzzle of yours together.

Just for this afternoon, I will unplug
the telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with
you in the backyard and blow bubbles.
Just for this afternoon, I will not yell
once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and
whine for the ice cream truck, and I will buy you one
if he comes by.
Just for this afternoon, I won't worry
about what you are going to be when you grow up, or
second guess every decision I have made where you are
concern ed.
Just for this afternoon, I will let you
help me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you
trying to fix them.
Just for this afternoon, I will take us
to McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can
have both toys.
Just for this evening, I will hold you in
my arms and tell you a story about how you were
born and how much I love you.
Just for this evening, I will let you
splash in the tub and not get angry.
Just for this evening, I will let you
stay up late while we sit on the porch and count all the stars.
Just for this evening, I will snuggle
beside you for hours, and miss my favourite TV shows.
Just for this evening when I run my
finger through your hair as you pray, I will simply be
grateful that God has given me the greatest gift ever given.
I will think about the mothers and
fathers who are searching for their missing children, the
mothers and fathers who are visiting their children's
graves instead of their bedrooms. The mothers
and fathers who are in hospital rooms
watching their children suffer senselessly and screaming
inside that little body
And when I kiss you goodnight I will hold
you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then,
that I will thank God for you, and ask him for

nothing, except one more day.............


Hi! I am a 29-year-old father. My wife and I have had a wonderful life together. God blessed us with a child too. Our daughter's name is Rachel and she is 10 months old. Not long ago did the doctors detect brain cancer in her little body.

There is only one way to save her and that is an operation. Sadly we don't have the money for the operation. AOL and Zdnet (in Zimbabwe ) have agreed to help us.

The only way they can help is this: If you send this email to other people<>AOL will track this email and count how many people get it. Every person that opens this email and sends it to at least 3 people will give us 32c. (in Zimbabwe dollars) Please help us.

New Virus announced by CNN

New Virus announced by CNN
This is the worst virus announced by CNN it has been classified by Microsoft as the most destructive virus ever "burns" the whole hard disc C of your computer
You should be alerted during the next days:
Do not open any message with an attached file called :
" Invitation "
regardless of who sent it . It is a virus that opens an Olympic Torch which "burns" the whole hard disc C of your computer.

This virus will be received from someone who has your e-mail address in his/her contact ! list, that is why you should send this e-mail to all your contacts.

It is better to receive this message 25 times than to receive the virus and open it.

If you receive a mail called "invitation", though sent by a friend, do not open it and shut down your computer immediately.

This is the worst virus announced by CNN, it has been classified by Microsoft as the most destructive virus ever.

This virus was discovered by McAfee yesterday, and there is no repair yet for this kind of virus.

This virus simply destroys the Zero Sector of the Hard Disc, where the vital information is kept.

SEND THIS E-MAIL TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW
COPY THIS E-MAIL AND SEND IT TO YOUR FRIENDS AND REMEMBER:
IF YOU SEND IT TO THEM, YOU WILL BENEFIT ALL OF US ÃÎØÑ ÝíÑæÓ ÃÚáäÊ Úäå (Óí Åä Åä )
ÕäÝÊå ( ãÇíßÑæÓæÝÊ) ÈÃäå ÇáÝíÑæÓ ÇáÃÔÏ ÖÑÑÇð Úáì ÇáÅØáÇÞ ....
æÇáÐí (íÍÑÞ) ÇáÞÑÕ ÇáÕáÈ ( C ) Ýí ÃÌåÒÉ ÇáßãÈíæÊÑ !


áÇ ÊÞã ÃÈÏÇ ÈÝÊÍ Ãí ÑÓÇáÉ ÈÑíÏ ÅáßÊÑæäí ÊÍÊæí Úáì ãáÝ ãÑÝÞ ÚäæÇäå Invitation
ÈÛÖ ÇáäÙÑ Úãä ÃÑÓá áß ÇáÑÓÇáÉ .
Åäå Èßá ÈÓÇØÉ ÝíÑæÓ íÞæã (ÈÍÑÞ) ßÇãá ÇáÞÑÕ ÇáÕáÈ ( C ) Ýí ÌåÇÒß ...
ÇáÑÓÇáÉ ÓæÝ ÊÕáß ãä ÔÎÕ áÏíå ÚäæÇäß ÇáÇáßÊÑæäí æÞÏ íßæä ãÚÑæÝÇ áÏíß !
æåÐÇ ãÇíÍÊã Úáíß ÅÑÓÇá åÐÇ ÇáÊÍÐíÑ Åáì ßÇÝÉ ÞÇÆãÉ ÌåÇÊ ÇáÅÊÕÇá áÏíß !.
ãä ÇáÃÝÖá Ãä ÊÕáß åÐå ÇáÑÓÇáÉ 25 ãÑÉ ãä Ãä ÊÕáß ÇáÑÓÇáÉ ÇáãÍÊæíÉ Úáì ÇáÝíÑæÓ æÊÞæã ÈÝÊÍåÇ !

Ýí ÍÇáÉ ÇÓÊáÇãß Ãí ãíá ÊÍÊ ÚäæÇä Invitation
æÇáÐí ÊÚÊÞÏ Ãäå ÇÑÓá áß ãä ÃÍÏ ÇÕÏÞÇÆß.. áÇ ÊÞã ÃÈÏÇ ÈÝÊÍ ÇáÑÓÇáÉ !
Èá ÃÛáÞ ÌåÇÒß Úáì ÇáÝæÑ !
ÔÑßÉ (ãßÇÝí) åí ãä ÇßÊÔÝ åÐÇ ÇáÝíÑæÓ íæã ÃãÓ .. ...
æáÇ íæÌÏ ÍÊì ÇáÂä ØÑíÞÉ áÅÕáÇÍ åÐÇ ÇáäæÚ ãä ÇáÝíÑæÓÇÊ !
Èßá ÈÓÇØÉ íÞæã ÇáÝíÑæÓ ÈÊÏãíÑ (ÇáÞØÇÚ ÕÝÑ) Ýí ÇáÞÑÕ ÇáÕáÈ ... .....
ÍíË ÊÍÝÙ ßá ÇáãÚáæãÇÊ ÇáÃÓÇÓíÉ .


áØÝÇ ÃÚÏ ÅÑÓÇá åÐå ÇáÑÓÇáÉ Åáì ßá ãä ÊÚÑÝ .
ÊÐßÑ ÈÃäß ÈÅÑÓÇá åÐå ÇáÑÓÇáÉ ÓæÝ äÓÊÝíÏ ÌãíÚäÇ

Why the wedding ring worn on the fourth finger...

This is cute. Try it out.

Why should the wedding ring be worn on the fourth finger?
There is a beautiful and convincing explanation given by the Chinese.....

Thumb represents your Parents
Second (Index) finger represents your Siblings
Middle finger represents your-Self
Fourth (Ring) finger represents your Life Partner
& the Last (Little) finger represents your children
Firstly, open your palms (face to face), bend the middle fingers and hold them together - back to back
Secondly, open and hold the remaining three fingers and the thumb - tip to tip
(As shown in the figure below):


Now, try to separate your thumbs (representing the parents)..., they will open, because your parents are not destined to live with you lifelong, and have to leave you sooner or later.
Please join your thumbs as before and separate your Index fingers (representing siblings)... ., they will also open, because your brothers and sisters will have their own families and will have to lead their own separate lives.

Now join the Index fingers and separate your Little fingers (representing your children)... ., they will open too, because the children also will get married and settle down on their own some day.

Finally, join your Little fingers, and try to separate your Ring fingers (representing your spouse).
You will be surprised to see that you just CANNOT....., because Husband & Wife have to remain together all their lives - through thick and thin!!

Please try this out......... ....
ISN'T THIS A LOVELY THEORY?

please help

last week a 3 year old girl in South Africa was beaten
and raped. She is still alive. The man
responsible was released on bail yesterday. He is walking the streets.
The Government is planning to close the child protection unit and this is a petition against it.
This is a very important petition. It is an essential part of the justice system for children. You may have already heard that there's a myth in South Africa that having sex with a virgin will cure AIDS. The Younger the virgin, the more potent the cure. This has led to an epidemic of rapes by infected males, with The correspondent infection of innocent kids. Many Have died in these cruel rapes. Recently in Cape Town , a 9-month-old baby was raped by 6 men. Please Think about that for a moment. The child abuse situation is now reaching catastrophic proportions and if we don't do something, then who will? Kindly add your name to the bottom of the list and please pass this on to as many people as you know.
If you are signature no.: 1000 - please
forward the mail-list to childprotectpca@saps.org.za
Please don't be complacent, do something about The kids of South Africa . You can make a difference. That child is fighting for life. This is just 1 of the million cases of child abuse, so please pledge your support and help keep CPU (CHILD PROTECTION UNIT) open. Please give your support to the petition And ensure that it goes to as many people as possible.
Please don't just leave it, make a difference.

In order to write your name copy this message And paste it in a new mail (compose). Or click on Forward and add your name to the list and send it on To others. Again, if you are number 1000 please send this to: childprotectpca@saps.org.za

1 -Jackson Kennedy ( Australia )
2 - Eugenie Knight Draper ( Australia )
3 - George Spiteri ( Australia )
4 - Susie Dureau ( Australia )
5 - Tim McCarthy ( Australia )
6 - Megan Gleeson ( Australia )
7 - Susie Gleeson Byrne ( China )
8 - Fiona Darrigan( China )
9 - Elizabeth >Hyland ( Dubai UAE)
10 - Margaret Winstanley ( Australia )
11 - Kate Williams ( Hong Kong )
12 - Shari Boyanton( England )
13 - ayelet shariv ( israel )
14 - Inbar Goren ( Israel )
15 - Dafna Gal ( Israel )
16 - Ruth Moushinsky( Israel )
17 - Aviv Moneta ( Israel )
18 - becky leinwand ( israel )
19 - Frances Derhy ( Israel )
20 - Merav Hernando ( Israel )
21 - talia schneider ( Israel )
22 - Sharon Aviv ( Israel )
23 - Liora Engler ( Australia )
24 - Abigail Fry ( England )
25 - Robyn Elmslie ( Australia )
26 - Stephanie Fuller ( Hong Kong )
27 - Tanya Burrows( Australia )
28 - Martha E Morrison ( Australia )
29 - Gordon Pears (NSW Australia )
30 - Patricia Pears (NSW Australia
31 - Bette Bishop(NSW Australia )
32 - Vaeda van Lieshout ( Victoria, Australia)
33 - Zac Oldfield ( Vic , Australia )
34 - Julie Woodberry ( Vic , Australia )
35 - Patrick Rigby ( Vic , Australia )
36 - Joshua Rigby ( Vic , Australia )
37 - lesa woodberry(vic. aus)
38 - Tania Pantalleresco ( Vic , Australia )
39 - Abbi Fendyk ( Australia )
40 - Angela Lancerotto ( Australia )
41 - Nicole Grech ( Australia )
42 - Rochelle Many ( Australia )
43 - Melissa de Leo ( Australia )
44 - Shereen Santiago ( Australia )
45 - Lisa Vella ( Australia )
46 - Simon Smithson
47 - Renay D'Amico ( Australia )
48 - John Green ( London , UK
49 - Sandra Powell ( London UK )
50 - Charlene Jones ( Perth , Australia )
51 - Helen Stathakis ( Perth , Australia )
52 - Anna Rogers ( Perth , Australia )
53 - Helen Barwick ( Perth , Australia )
54 - kerry summerton [ adelaide Australia ]
55 - Kadina Gregory ( South Australia )
56 - Fillmore Family ( South Australia )
57 - E Stiesch ( South Australia )
58 - K Craig ( Australia )
59 - E Cleveland ( Victoria , Australia ) 60 - S Flanagan ( Australia )
61 - M.Gliddon( Australia )
62 - J Gliddon ( Australia )
63 - R Maher ( Australia )
64 - L Morrison ( Australia )
65 - P Woods ( Australia )
66 - C Morrison Australia )
67 - S Morrison ( Australia )
68 - J Morrison ( Australia )
69 - R Woods ( Australia )
70 - T Draper ( Australia )
71 - L Gentle ( Australia )
72 - Campton ( Australia )
73 - J Beale ( Australia )
74 - L Malamoo-Jib ( Australia )
75 - R.Backo ( Australia )
76 - Raymond D. BLANCO ( AUSTRALIA )
77 - B.Toby ( Australia )
78 - Annie Webster ( Australia )
79 - Maz Clarke ( Australia )
80 - Jenny Cooper( Australia )
81 - russell Cooper( Australia )
82 - Ben CooperAustralia)
83 - Lauren Smith ( Australia )
84 - Tess Hynes ( Australia )
85 - Casey Symonds ( Australia )
86 - Claudia Beinhoff ( United Kingdom )
87 - Kerry Weddell ( South Africa )
88 - Daina Dyball ( Australia )
89 - Christen Allen ( Australia )
90 - Alira Hayward ( Australia )
91 - Lenore Hayward ( Australia )
92 - Jordan Toomey ( Australia )
93 - Kayt Howe ( Australia )
94 - Kerstin Thuresson ( Australia )
95 - Marie Tatters
97 - John Ross ( Australia )
98 - Susan Ross ( Australia )
99 - Gloria Grant Australia)
100 - George Grant ( Australia )
101 - Vicki Remington Australia )
102 - Melanie Close ( Australia )
103 - Lyn Shepherd ( Australia )
104 - Judith Cassells ( Australia )
105 - Isabel Boura ( Australia )
106 - Ester Pereira ( South Africa )
107 - Helder Pereira ( South Africa )
108 - Antolia Mabokela ( South Africa )
109 - Ed Viana ( South Africa )
110 - Carlos Bello ( Maputo Mozambique )
111 - Joao Ruas (Maputo-Mozambique)
112 - Sara Americano (Maputo-Mozambique)
113 - SÃf³nia Timana (Maputo-Mozambique)
114 - Eugenia Comissal (Maputo-Mozambique)
115 - David Nhancume (Maputo-Mozambique)
116 - Maria AntÃf³nia Barros ( Maputo - Mozambique
117 - Francisca Ibrahimo Da Silva ( Maputo -
MoÃf§ambique)
118 -Millie Whitehead ( Maputo )
119 - RenïEBooysen
120 - Sonja Venter ( Mozambique , Maputo )
121 - Nahida Karimo ( Maputo )
122 - L Pereira ( Mozambique )
123 - Guambe, ( Maputo )
124 - Costa, Liliana ( Maputo , Mozambique )
125 - GuimarÃf£es, Helu?a Maputo , Mozambique
)
126 - Em?ia Tembe (Maputo MoÃf§ambique)
127 - RAUL ALMEIDA - Maputo
128 - Latif, Abubacar A. - Maputo/Mozambique
129 - Teresa FerrÃf£o - Mozambique
130 - Rosa Maria
131 - Nhancolo, Odete( Maputo , Mozambique )
132 - EstevÃf£o Chumaio
133 - GAWANA MBAZIMA(MAPUTO- MOZAMBIQUE)
134 - Pioris, TeÃf³filo(Maputo- Mozambique)
134 - Inocencia
M.F.C.Cantengo( Maputo-Mozambiqu e)
135 - Ubisse,I(Maputo- Mozambique)
136 - SALOMAO MUIANGA ( MAPUTO CITY )
137 - [SANDRA ELIZABETE MACARINGUE
MAPUTO/MOZAMBIQUE]
138 - OTILIA ROGERIO BEMBELE - MAPUTO /
MOÃfâ?¡AMBIQUE
139 - Bernardo -MAPUTO/MOÃfâ?¡ AMBIQUE
140 - Leonor Sheila
Pene"wuda"(Mpto- Mocambique)
150 - FATIMA MATEÃ,
MAPUTO-MOZAMBIQUE)
151 - Samuel Uamusse ( Maputo , Mozambique )
152 - Sandra Caniat Karimo ( Maputo ,
Mozambique )
153 - Lutfe Karimo ( Maputo , Mozambique )
154 - Kayla Caniat Karimo ( Maputo ,
Mozambique )
155 - Kyandra Caniat Karimo ( Maputo ,
Mozambique )
156 - Monica Vasconcelos Roberts
157 - Eric Vasconcelos Roberts
158 - Andre Vasconcelos Roberts
159 - Filipe GuimarÃf£es ( Brazil )
160 - Claudia Ferreira ( Brazil )
161 - Deborah Cunha ( Brazil ) 162 - Acyr Luz ( Brazil
)
163 - Maria Eduarda GuimarÃf£es ( Brazil )
164 - Leandro Quadros ( Brazil )
165 - Priscila da Luz GuimarÃf£es( Brazil )
166 - ESarah IssE( Maputo -
MoÃf§ambique)
167 - E.Paulo CamÃfµes
(Maputo-MoÃf§ambique)
168 - EMaria Teresa CamÃfµes
(Maputo-Mo§ambique)
169 - EJosECam ( Maputo
- MoÃf§ambique)
170 - ï¢EDalila Nordine
Maputo-Mo§ambique)
171 - bio Abdulla
(Chimoio-MoÃf§ ambique)
172 - Tina NYOMBO ( Angola - Luanda )
173 - Bern da Flora NYOMBO (Angola-Luanda)
174 - Vanda Soares ( Luanda - Angola )
175 - Andreza Vasconcelos (Luanda-Angola)
176 - Ãf'ngela Chagas ( Luanda - Angola )
177 - Fernanda IZATA ( Luanda - Angola )
178 - Malvina Teixeira (NY-USA)
179 - EANTONIO IZATA ( Luanda - Angola ) 180 - Ulisses da Cruz Luanda - Angola )
181 - JosEAlexandre de Oliveira (
Belgium )
182 - Beto Figueiredo ( U.K. )
183 - EMANUEL LEMOS DA SILVA
LUANDA-ANGOLA)
184 - EZulmira Gon§alves
(Benguela-Angola)
185 - Rayssa Peairo ( Angola )
186 -LIO SILVEIRA F. MESQUITA
(BENGUELA EANGOLA)
187 - EMathias LourenÃf§o ( Luanda
EANGOLA)
188 - ECarlos Cepeda ( Luanda Angola )
189 - dia Cruz ( Luanda
EAngola)
190 - �ETidiane Nahary ( Luanda
�EAngola
191 - �EVanessa Jackson( USA )
192 - Walter Afonso ( Luanda Angola )
193 - Paulo Maria Francisco ( In Luanda , Republic of Angola )
194 - �ELopes do Nascimento (In
Benfica-Luanda, Republic of Angola )
195 - Tony Domingos (in Viana-Luanda, Republic of Angola )
196 - �ECruz Junior ( Luanda
�EAngola)
197 - �ERuth Saraiva ( Luanda
�EAngola)
198 - Sandra Louro( Luanda - Angola )
199 - Luciano Fonseca ( Praia Cape Verde) 200 - Nezi Brito ( Hanson - USA )
201 - Carlos Brito(Oslo-Nooruega )
202 - Maia Brito(Oslo-Noruega)
203 - Esma Alissi(Oslo- Norway).
204 - Shayma Alissi (Surrey-UK)
205 - Ane Haugen(Surrey- Uk)
206 - Anders Solvang (Sydney- Australia)
207 - Marte Lajord Seth (E
Norway )
208 - Siren Stefanussen ( Drammen- Norway )
209 - Kaia Kristine Pettersen ( drammen- Norway ) 210 - Ranveig Menes Andersen (Drammen-Norway)
211 - Lene Menes Alm(Drammen- Norway)
212 - Britt Hasselberg ( Drammen - Norway )
213 - Tone Monsen ( Oslo - Norway )
214 - Vanessa Borgli ( Oslo- Norway )
215 - Eva Christin Laszka(Oslo- Norway
216 - Tom Brodal Bjerke (Norway)
217 - Rita Laska-Marosi( Budapest- Hungary)
218 - Sharon Johnsen(Kuala Lumpur-Malaysia)
219 - Tore Johnsen(Oslo- Norway)
220 - Chrystina Tan Teck Lian ( Kuala Lumpur )
221 - Fong Oy Leng( Kuala Lumpur - Malaysia )
222 - Helene Fong ( Kuala Lumpur ?- Malaysia )
223 - Angie Ang ( Singapore )
224 - Francis Chua ( Singapore )
225 - Sim Claire ( Singapore
226 - Jacky Wong ( Singapore )
227 - Giselia Lim ( Singapore )
228 - Garry Lim ( Singapore )
229 - Nana Wang ( Singapore )
230 - Arwati ( Singapore )
231 - Mahadir ( Singapore )
232 - Rukiah ( Singapore )
233 - Alip ( Singapore )
234 - Arianah ( Singapore )
235 - Azlindah ( Singapore )
236 - Fazilrudin ( Singapore )
237 - Azar ( Singapore )
238 - Yen Ling ( Malaysia )
239 - Carine ( Malaysia )
240 - Kam Lok Kun ( Malaysia )
241 - Tee Siok Chew ( Malaysia )
242 - Selina Josephine Matupang ( Singapore )
243 - Shallynn Teoh ( Malaysia )
244 - Sivakumaran ( Malaysia )
245 - Jeslyn Teo ( Singapore )
246 - Jessica Ang( Singapore )
247 - Lina Tan ( Singapore )
248 - Chee Keat ( Singapore )
249 - Tabitha ( Singapore )
250 - Puiwan ( Singapore )
251 - Siew Cheng ( Malaysia )
252 - Choi Har ( Malaysia )
253 - Tommy Hoe ( Malaysia )
254 - SohCheng Lim ( Singapore )
255 - Lim Hwi Eng ( Singapore )
256 - Lim Lay Ngoh ( Singapore )
257 - Chok Leng ( Singapore )
258 - CS See ( Singapore )
259 - YT Toh ( Singapore )
260 - Clarence Fernandez ( Canada )
261 - Asha T ( Australia )
262 - Karina Isdahl ( Canada )
263 - Jacqueline Ostick ( Canada )
264 - Eli Wick ( Canada )
265 - Katherine Storrie ( Canada )
266 - Jamie Borock ( Canada )
267 - Jamie Stadelmann ( canada )
268 - Chandra Henkel ( Canada )
269 - Sarah Henkel( Canada )
270 - Katy bast ( Canada )
271 - Ashley Szederkenyi( Canada )
272 - Cameo Kerr( canada )
273 - Serena Bining ( Canada !)
274 - Harjot Gill ( canada !!)
275 - Harmeet Mann( Canada :D)-- Please sign this is sooooo cruell-.-
276 - nARBIR MATHARU ( CANADA )
277 - Kajal Parmar ( Canada :D)
278 - ARSHDEEP BASI:D( CANADA )
279 - E.AKizuki( Canada )
280 - Vineeta ( Canada )
281 - PRIYANKA KUAMR ( NEW ZEALAND
282 - Kajal Chandra
283 - courtney smith
284 - miki lambert
285 - maddie
286 - Courtney ( Victoria , Australia )
287 - shira shery( Israel )
288- Carisse( Melbourne , Australia )
289-Joana F ( Melbourne , Australia )
290- Dani M ( Melbourne , Australia )
291- Arlene M ( Melb , Australia )
292-Rhonda Shuter ( Toronto , Canada )
293-Samara Shuter ( Toronto , Canada )
294-Shannon Kook-Chun ( Toronto-Montreal , Canada 295-Millie Marshall ( London ) 296-Simon Marshall ( Vancouver , Canada ) 297-Emily Doyle-Yamaguchi ( Vancouver , Canada
)
298 - Garett Jansen ( Vancouver , Canada
299 - Michele Lougheed ( Vancouver , Canada ) 300 - Diane Divall ( Vancouver , Canada )
301 - P. Grandinetti ( Vancouver , Canada )
302 - L. Grandinetti ( Vancouver , Canada )
303 - C. Bowes ( Vancouver , Canada )
304 - S. Rae ( New Westminster , BC , Canada )
305 - Christine Heidt ( Edmonton , AB , Canada
)
306.-jeannine chenier( edmonton ,ab, canada )
307 - Lynda Cyr ( Edmonton , AB , Canada )
308- Tracey Turcott
309- Kerry Cyr
310- Linda Turcott (Abbotsford, BC Canada)
311 - Corie Robinson (Chilliwack, BC Canada)
312 - Wendy Robinson (Chilliwack, B.C.
Canada)
313 - Dora Zwart (Chilliwack, B.C . Canada)
314 - Leona Rodrique (Chilliwack, BC Canada)
315 - Sarah Hernandez (Montreal, Canada) 316-Andrewlina Hernandez (Kota Kinabalu,
Malaysia)
317 - Hartini Hashim (Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia)
318 - Emily Clarice Joannes (Kuala Lumpur,
Malaysia)
319 - Ann Marian Ronald (Malaysia)
320) Milani Stephen (Sabah, Malaysia)
321) Andrias Anthony (Sabah, Malaysia)
322) Marion Maeve Michael (Sabah, Malaysia)
323) Mandy Mae Michael (Sabah, Malaysia)
324) Judith Molly (Sabah, Malaysia)
325) Stanise Ansanit ( Sabah, Malaysia)
326) Noor Aini Razi (Sabah,Malaysia)
327) Marjorie Poigi (Sabah, Malaysia)
328) Esalilawati Aliamat ( Sabah Malaysia )
329) Rujiah Jumin (Sabah, Malaysia)
330) Emmawati Azaini (Sabah, Malaysia)
331) FLAVIA TAMIN (SABAH, MALAYSIA)
332) Phillis Tamin (Sabah, MALAYSIA)
333) Janette Mackri (Sabah, Malaysia)
334) Angelie Tee Giok Bee (Sabah, Malaysia)
335) Helen Patrick (Sabah, Malaysia)
336) Noria Palalun (Sabah, Malaysia)
337) Lyddia (Malaysia)
338) Pacita Pangus (Sabah,Malaysia)
339) Helen Wong ( Penang, Malaysia )
340) Khim Ow (Penang, Malaysia)
341) KPTan (KL, Malaysia)
342) Christine Tan (KL, Malaysia)
343) Belinda Dias Gomes (Kolkata, India) 344] Angela Rodrigues 345] Leslie/Winnie Kerr(Ontario, Canada)
346) Sheila/Janak Mehta (Delhi, India)
347] Nita Mukherjee [Delhi, India]
348) Gerard Alvarez ( Delhi, India)
349) Ruby George (Philippines)
350) Sherrie Lyn Tecson (Philippines)
351)Francesca A. Dungca (Philippines)
352) Margot Cabrera (OK, USA)
353) Carol A.Lichtensteiger (SG, Switzerland)
354) Minerva A. Carag (Philippines)
355) Mary Rose C. Roxas (Philippines)
356) Jo Falmarin (Pilipinas)
357) Jonas Tayag (Philippines)
358) Grace Cuchapin (Philippines)
359)Jenet S. Lorenzana(Philippines)
360) zeineth m. sabido (philippines)
361)Kathleen Joy R. Espectacion (philippines)
362) Aubrey Concepcion (Philippines)
363) Dennis Chan (Philippines)
364) Jenny Lui (Philippines)
365) John Carpio (Saudi Arabia)
366) Joana-Lyn de la Cruz (Philippines)
367) Emily B. Salvador (Philippines)
368) Virginia A. Suarez (Philippines)
369)Marites Herrera(Philippines)
370) Karen Del Mundo (Philippines)
371) Melinda Sta. Rita (Philippines)
372) Lot Ignacio (Philippines/Canada)

Blind girl...

A blind girl story who hated herself

Travellers Beware!!

Hi Friends...This was said to take place in Sydney Australia. Richard

This guy went out on a Saturday night a few weeks ago to a party.

He was having a good time and had a couple of beers and some girls seemed to like him & invited him to go to another party.

He quickly agreed & decided to go along with her.

She took him to a party in some apartment and they continued to drink, & even got involved with some drugs unknown).

The next thing he knew, he woke up completely naked in a bathtub filled with ice. He was still feeling the effects of the drugs, but looked around to see he was alone.

He looked down at his chest, which had CALL 000 or YOU'LL DIE" written on it with lipstick.

He saw a phone was on a stand next to the tub so he Picked it up & dialed.

He explained to the EMS operator what the situation was & that he didn't know where he was, what he took, or why he was really calling.

She advised him to get out of the tub.

He did, and he appeared normal, so she told him to check his back. He did, he found two 9 inch slits on his lower back.

She told him to get back into the tub immediately, and they sent a rescue team over.

Apparently, after being examined, he found out more of what had happened.

His kidneys were stolen.

They were worth $10,000 each on the black market.

The people involved had to be at least medical students & it was not just recreational drugs he was given.

Regardless, he is currently in the hospital on a life support, awaiting a spare kidney.

The University of Sydney in conjunction with the Royal Prince Alfred
hospital is conducting tissue research to match the victim with a donor.

A new crime ring that is targeting business travellers.

This ring is well organized and well funded, has very skilled personnel
& is currently operating in most major cities around the world and recently very active in Sydney .

The crime begins when a business traveller goes to a lounge for a drink at the end of the work day.

A person in the bar walks up as they sit alone and offers to buy them a drink.

The last thing the traveler remembers until they wake up in a hotel room
bathtub, their body submerged to their neck in ice, is sipping that drink.

There is a note taped to the wall instructing them not to move and to call 000.

A phone is on the small table next to the bathtub for them to call.

The business traveller is instructed by the 000 operator to very slowly and
carefully reach behind them and feel there is a tube protruding from the back.

The business traveler finds the tube and answers "YES".

The 000 operator tells them to remain still, having already sent paramedics

to help. The Operator knows that both of thetraveller's kidneys had been harvested.

This is not a scam or out of science fiction novel. It is real.

It is documented and confirmable.

If you travel or someone close to you travels, please be careful.

My friend's husband is a Sydney EMT and they have received alerts regarding this crime ring.

It is to be taken very seriously.

The daughter of a friend of a fire-fighter had this happen To her.

"I was approached yesterday afternoon around 3.30 pm in the Coles
parking lot at Noranda by two males, asking what kind of perfume I was wearing.

Then they asked if I'd like to sample some fabulous Scent they were
willing to sell me at a very reasonable rate.

I probably would have agreed had I not received an emai l some weeks ago, warning of this scam.The men continued to stand between parked cars, I guess to wait for someone else to hit on.

I stopped a lady going towards them, I pointed at them and told her about how I was sent an email at work about someone walking up to you at the malls, in parking lots, and asking you to sniff perfume that they are selling at a cheap price."
THIS IS NOT PERFUME - IT IS EITHER!

When you sniff it, you'll pass out and they'll take your wallet, your
valuables, and heaven knows what else.

If it were not for this email, I probably would have sniffed the
"perfume", but thanks to the generosity of an emailing friend, I was
spared whatever might have happened to me, and wanted to do the same for you.

These guys hit Sydney and Melbourne 2 weeks ago and now they are doing it in Perth and Queensland .

Balloon Fashion Show--Enjoy

I think twisting of balloons together as entertainment for little kids, but these photos
Taken at a "Balloon Fashion Show" in China illustrate how far it has come as An art form. Some are amazingly imaginative and detailed!